It is Finished

On Monday Carl had his thesis defense at 10:00. His thesis was titled "The Ecclesiological Deficiency of the Democratic Practice in Congregational Churches" or to make is simple Why Voting in Church Isn't Good Enough. He rose early to buy doughnuts and fruit for those that would be attending and even got the kids breakfast and set out the video camera. I was thankful for our neighbour Megan who offered to watch the kids for the morning so that I could be at Carl's defense. It was an exciting morning!

I could tell Carl was nervous, and I wasn't helping by taking forever to set up the camera. He started off giving an overview of his thesis and as he spoke, became less tense and more expressive. He spoke for over 30 minutes, with passion and excitement. It's been ages since I've heard him speak and I've missed it.

After Carl was finished, his thesis adviser Tim, got up and gave affirmation to Carl. Tim said that thesis writing is either hard, very hard, or very very hard, and he figured for Carl, it was hard (what a compliment!). He knew that he had written a lot in a very short time, stating that Carl probably had days where he ate three meals, spent time with the kids, talked with his wife, and still managed to write 10 pages. I tell you, Carl is quite the writer! Tim had a few hard questions and Carl did a very good job responding to them.

Then it was the second reader's turn, Valerie, who is another professor on staff. She congratulated Carl on a job well done, and also had some questions for him. She commended him on making the paper readable and easy for those to understand. And Carl said that was the whole point because he wrote this paper to be a resource that anyone in a church could use.
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With the little remaining time, three people were able to converse with Carl and ask further questions. It was neat how people from classes, people from our courtyard, some professors, a friend from church and I all gathered to hear Carl and learn about this topic, which seems to be an important one in many churches. I was blessed to receive congratulations as well from Valerie, who said that I had a lot to do with the success of the thesis writing. I thanked her for recognizing me and felt good that I supported Carl along the way. I was also blessed by words of affirmation from Carl's classmates that were there. They expressed how they appreciated Carl and that his thesis and his passion for ministry has impacted many already.

I'm so proud of Carl and I'm sure that he is very relieved that his thesis is finished. It has been a long process of writing, 4 months, but an even longer time in the making, 8 years of ministry. Carl says that he had to quit writing once he reached 120 pages, but there's still so much to write. Maybe there will be a second thesis.....

Nine Months

Isn't amazing to think how quickly a baby grows in nine months? From inside the womb, they go from a tiny speck to a fully formed person. And then from being a helpless 8 pound baby who can't even focus their eyes to a little person who can get themselves around and interacts with the world. Talk about miracles!

Well, today Asha celebrated the completion of her 9th month with us. We had a little photoshoot with her before church. I figured that would be the best time; her dress would still be clean, she wouldn't be cranky and it wouldn't be too hot out either. So we stopped and tried to take some pictures. It was a bit difficult because she just wanted to crawl around, but the grass was wet from the sprinklers and she wasn't impressed, but she didn't want to be held.....

As you can see, we got some pretty cute pictures of her.
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This month Asha has mastered many new tricks, for example:

*She can knock over the CD player and blanket box while in her playpen...Go-go Gadget Arms?
*She can make spit bubbles
*Asha can make a kissy mouth and then moves forward to kiss you
*She can sign More and is working on Thank You
*Asha can drink from a sippy cup
*She responds to her name!
*Asha can wiggle out of her stroller
*She can walk along furniture
*Asha is a great wrestler, the top baby in the church nursery

This month Asha has really come out into the world by giving everyone HUGE smiles and laughing at almost anything people say. She is really the most happy baby I've met in a long time. People at school and church are impressed with her new outgoing nature. Asha has really been a blessing and a constant source of entertainment this month. We love you Pookie!

Now just for the record, this video was taken at 9:00 at night....and Asha hadn't slept ALL day. See what I mean about being the happiest kid around?

Baseball Boy - In Action

Joel in his Baseball Uniform; His team is the Los Angeles Dodgers
He had no problem hitting the ball
Waiting at the base for the next hit; gotta love the stance
Joel's biggest fans

Kindred Spirits

Today I had the pleasure of going for lunch with my friend Laura. Our lunch date was a week overdue since last Thursday there was some mix up with Carl's class, and Laura had a doctor's appointment and by the time all was said and done, we couldn't go. I was pretty disappointed, but I learned a bit about myself that day.

I was upset about not going for lunch not because I needed time away (I went grocery shopping all by myself that afternoon and didn't feel any better) but I needed to spend time with a good friend. I crave relationships that go deeper than just surface talk. I used to be a person, many years ago, that loved having a million buddies, and didn't mind that my social calendar was too busy to maintain any type of meaningful relationship. But over the years, I guess with time passing and me getting older....sigh....

as I have matured I have realized that I need at least one good friend whom you can feel safe with and pour out your heart. And Laura is that kind of friend for me. So you can imagine how thrilled I was that it worked out for us to go for lunch today.

We tried out this new Chinese restaurant that was close to her house. As we went in and ordered, we quickly got down to what was happening in our lives. Her, concerned with pre-term labour and being off work and when to move back to Canada, and me, the Mom's retreat and whether or not to serve with M.C.C. or in a church in Canada. As we were sharing, two things came up that confirmed for me that we are definitely kindred spirits.

Laura was asking me about how the Mom's retreat was and I told her that I had a good time but since I was staying by myself in the basement of the cabin I had a bit of trouble sleeping (it just so happened because I was the only one with a baby). Laura leaned forward and looked at me so I continued because I felt a safety in our conversation.

I have never admitted to anyone (except Carl; and now I guess the entire world) that I'm afraid of the dark and that I am easily traumatized by shows like C.S.I, Criminal Minds, Medium, scary movie previews, the news....and this had led me to even be scared to be by myself in case I might fall victim to some crazy murderer. So I admitted to Laura that I had hardly slept a wink at the Mom's retreat because of my fear. Her eyes widened and she blurted out before I could feel uncomfortable, "Oh my gosh! That's totally me. I can hardly sleep if the closet door is open and I won't get up unless the light is on!". What a relief to hear that someone else struggles with the same fear.

As we were getting ready to leave, Laura said that it was meant for us to be friends here in this time and place and that God knew we needed each other. That meant so much. I do believe that and am so thankful for Laura.

We paused before we got up and Laura quickly reminded me to take my leftover container.
So I replied, "I would just cry if I left these yummy leftovers here. Wouldn't that just be awful?".
And so she asked, "Have you ever cried when you left your leftovers at a restaurant?"
"Actually....I have. It was after a date I had with Carl and I was looking forward to having my chicken for lunch the next day. I was so upset that I forgot my food, it was the most disappointing thing that could have happened".
Laura's eyes twinkled and she smiled, "I have too. In fact come back to my place and I'll share my short story I wrote about the heartbreaking event when I left my Steak Gargonzola Alfredo behind".
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"Oh, the comfort, the inexpressible comfort of feeling safe with a person; having neither to weigh thoughts nor measure words, but to pour them all out, just as they are, chaff and grain together, knowing that a faithful hand will take and sift them, keep what is worth keeping, and then, with a breath of kindness, blow the rest away.” George Eliot

Baseball Boy

This past Saturday, while I was at the Mom's Retreat, Joel started baseball. I had called the local community centre a few weeks ago to inquire about soccer, but found out that I had missed the soccer season, by about 5 months. Oh well. They told me about the T-ball league that was coming up for 3-6 year olds and so I said I was interested for my 5 year old son. (I briefly thought about signing Kezia up, but I know she wouldn't be as keen. Can you just see her standing in the field with the glove, not engaged at all with the game, but the lovely bugs on the ground, the shape of the clouds, the music playing in the next field....)

I came home with the information to share with Carl. It was going to be 6 weeks of games with the first week being a clinic to teach the kids. Joel would play every Saturday and get his own team t-shirt to keep. At the end of the season he gets his own trophy, no matter the outcome of his team, and a BBQ party. And all for $35. Carl and I were pretty excited about this opportunity for Joel, but we figured it only makes sense to ask him if he wanted to. Well, after a smile and twinkle of his eye, he said, "I get to play real baseball with a real team?"

Now the season was suppose to start on April 12 but because of some unforeseen circumstances, the start date was delayed by a week. It was agonizing for Joel, because he had started the countdown to T-ball at day 13; and now he had to add another 7 sleeps! I was a bit disappointed because I knew that I would be gone. Carl got some good video footage of Joel learning how to play baseball, not T-ball like I originally thought, but pitch-it-to-the-kid-to-hit baseball.

At first Joel was a bit hesitant but after a while, he yelled to the side where Carl and Kezia were, "Hey Dad, I can do this. I'm not embarrassed anymore!" I was glad to see, as I watched the video, that he wasn't the tallest kid on his team. Joel is starting to feel a bit self conscious of being the one that sticks out among all the shorter kids.

My lil' slugger hit the ball after only two attempts, and figured out when to run to the next base. It was hilarious to see him standing on the base watching, with his hands on his hips, resembling his mother's stance. But he did what he needed to do and had lots of fun doing it. I hope that through this experience he will enjoy the game and benefit from being on a team. I think that experience is so life enriching.

I'm really excited about going this Saturday to see him and I'm going to be the crazy Mom with the video and digital camera. I hope I don't embarrass him!

The Great Mom Escape

This weekend I had the privilege of going on a Mom's retreat that was hosted by our church. It was the first Mom's retreat that I've ever gone on. In fact, I don't think I've even attended a ladies retreat. I was pretty excited about going with Asha, but I was feeling a bit bad for Carl because he had come down with a pretty nasty cold and would be home alone with Joel and Kezia. Well, I knew he'd be fine and that the kids would take care of him, or at least not fight so much knowing that their Dad was ill.

On Friday after our ministry discernment meeting I packed up the last bit of my things and waited for my ride. I was amazed at the amount of stuff Asha needed. She took up most of the large suitcase with all of her necessities! Joel and Kezia hugged and kissed me profusely over and over and told me that they would miss me SO much. That was pretty special. I rode up with Shauna, Mika, and Noelia. We stopped at Starbucks to meet up with the other vans and I got a vanilla bean frapuccino. Not really a great idea....

The hour drive to Shaver Lake is beautiful, but the road was very curvy as we ascended up the hills. After 30 minutes, we had to ask Shauna to pull over; the three of us weren't feeling very good and I could feel that frapuccino sloshing in my stomach, and then my throat. Thankfully I didn't throw up, but I discovered that I do in fact get car sick. Sigh, I guess it comes with getting older......

We arrived at the cabin by about 6:30 and there was pizza and veggies waiting for us. In total there were 20 ladies present, and I was the only one who had brought a baby. All the ladies gave Asha lots of love and attention over the weekend, which allowed me to participate more fully in the activities.

On Friday night we watched a movie and ate popcorn, we had a Real Women, Real Issues talk on Saturday night, which ranged from the hilarious ultra-personal to serious issues. It was neat to hear everyone be so candid and frank. The food was amazing, and though there were TONS of snacks, I hardly ate any garbage. I was pleased with myself; food and I have a longstanding relationship! I really enjoyed the singing time and the Irish Prayer that was shown a number of times using powerpoint.

The one highlight of the weekend was the prayer labyrinth. I had never heard of such a thing, so I was curious how it would work. There were 11 stations that were set up downstairs and outside for us to walk through on Saturday morning. Each of us got an MP3 player to guide us through the labyrinth. I attempted to put Asha down for a nap before I started, but she had other plans, so I was only able to get through half of the labyrinth before lunch. The stations were, Inward Journey, Noise in our Life, Letting Go, Hurt, True Compass, Holy Space, Outward Living, For Self, Planet, For Others, and Impressions. At each station we listened to a segment on the MP3 and had a visual in front of us, either for us to look at or to participate in. The Letting Go station encouraged us to pick up a stone, imagine all of our hurts in that stone and then when we were ready, to drop it into a bucket. For many women, and for myself, that was the hardest station.

The station that was really powerful was the Noise in our Life because I realized that so often am I tired not because of the outward noise of life, but the voices in my heart that keep pounded in my head and distracting me from hearing God. I was also struck by the Impression station. The recording asked me questions as I sat like, "How many breaths make up a life?" and "What will history say about us when we are history too?" and "How does my present effect the future?". I also had the chance to light candles and pray for people.

After lunch, Asha finally went down for a nap and I finished the last few stations of the prayer labyrinth and had some time to journal. I hardly ever journal, but I think it is a positive thing that I will do more often. It'll be my time to write letters to God.

For our craft activity later that afternoon, we made stepping stones, and I knew right away what I wanted to do. I resisted my desire to make a perfectly symmetrical pattern and chose instead to do a circular pattern that would resemble a labyrinth.

I chose for it to represent my life, which during this weekend, became more clear to me.

First I started with the dark stones on the outer edge with red pieces of glass. The stones represent me and the pieces of glass represent the noise and distraction in my life. On the outer edge, the glass is more prominent and the stones are irregular shaped and dark. Then as the stones circle and move towards the centre, they become lighter and smoother, through circumstances that cause heat and friction in our life. The shards of glass become lighter, less noticeable, like the noise and the distractions of life become less. The stone in the centre of the labyrinth is clear, smooth and reflects the light that hits it; it represents my desire to be transparent, free from distraction and noise, to fully reflect Christ in my life.

The verse that I have been replaying in my head the last few months is Jeremiah 29:11 which says,

"For I know the plans I have for you, declares the Lord, plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future."

But during my Duet Time (me and God) I was led to read the entire chapter and found that verse 12 and 13 really spoke to me where I am at right now.

"Then you will call upon me and come and pray to me, and I will listen to you.
You will seek me and find me when you seek me with all your heart".

So I chose to put Jer. 29:13 on my stepping stone to remind me that this life I'm living is a winding path that is interspersed with distractions and noise, but as I move towards the centre, I become more Christ like. Some days I can identify and ignore the noise as I move towards the centre, other days I fall back towards the edge. But the prayer labyrinth I walked created the space for me to identify what is really going on in my life.

It was a very good weekend for me. I learned a lot about my relationship with God and I learned a lot about myself.

Check your Bible

This all started a couple of weeks ago when our neighbour Nate asked Joel if he knew what a wedgie was and when Joel said, "No", Nate proceeded to demonstrate. We all got a laugh over that one, especially Nate, who's joy is in corrupting young children, since he doesn't have any of his own. Well, to be fair, Nate and his wife Maddie and the kids all have a neat relationship, since they go over every weekend and play the Wii together.

This weekend, Nate asked Joel if he wanted another wedgie. Joel said, "No, but maybe it'll be fun to give one to Kezia". Nate said he wouldn't, so Joel gave one to Kezia anyways. Kezia squealed and ran away. Then Nate and our other neighbour Ben told Joel that since he had given his sister a wedgie, he would have to have a swirlie. Joel looked puzzled, and wondered what a swirlie was. So Nate explained and then told him some more non-truths to corrupt Joel even further. Then Nate and Ben grabbed him, took him to Ben's place, and almost gave him a swirlie. But Joel managed to escape.

When I got back from my weekend trip (I know you are all wondering where I went, but not yet folks...) I overheard Joel say to Kezia,

"You know that in the Bible it says that if you give your sister a wedgie, you have to get a swirlie, it's in the Bible because that's what Nate and Ben say".

What?! What version is that?

Questions, Answers, & More Questions

The Ministry Discernment Seminar is a meeting that all graduates of M.B.B.S have. So this past Friday Carl (and me too) had the meeting. Before anything can take place, Carl answered a set of questions, then gave a copy of them to a number of people he wanted to be part of this meeting. He asked a friend from class, someone he has connections with through church, a few people that live in the courtyard with us, plus a faculty member here on campus, as well as his faculty advisor from Winnipeg who was on the speaker phone.

I had briefly looked at the questions Carl answered so that I would be prepared for the meeting. But as for mentally and emotionally preparing for the meeting, well, I was distracted with packing (hold on, next post), Carl's cold, and taking minutes at this meeting, to really process what was about to take place.

See, it wasn't just meant to have people meet and talk about your time at school and chat about our plans, but it was meant for people who see us, really see us, to speak truth into our lives and help us discern what our next step is. That's a big thing to just walk into, but unfortunately, that's what I did.

So as I'm taking minutes, people were asking Carl to clarify some of the answers he wrote as well as taking the opportunity to ask more probing and personal questions. Only about half way through the meeting, I stopped and thought about what was being asked and how Carl was responding. Then I started to engage in the meeting and answer questions myself.

During the meeting, we talked a lot about what was next for us, and of course we discussed us pursuing a term with Mennonite Central Committee. We talked about why we wanted to go and serve somewhere in Latin America and what that would look like for our family. The group recognized that we have gifts that would work well in a cross cultural setting and also affirmed us in our pastoral gifts. But they wondered why we hadn't pursued pastoral ministry in the same way as we had been with M.C.C. I thought it was because going with M.C.C. just made sense; hey, we're gone from home, why not be gone even longer? We have always desired to live in another country, so why not go?

I wondered if maybe there was an underlying fear of heading back into pastoral ministry and that's why we hadn't really thought about staying in North America. I haven't had much time to think about this, but my friend Megan, who was at the ministry discernment meeting, came by this morning to see how I was doing. Throughout the conversation, I wondered if we are afraid of being back into a church because we came out of our last experience with so many mixed emotions. We were tired, but we were leaving something that was so good for us, leaving something that was so familiar to us, leaving friends that we had only related to within the church context. Now that we've been gone, though our physical presence isn't in that church, we are still a part of it. And working in another church would mean that we wouldn't be a part of our last church anymore. Am I not ready to let that go? Am I not ready for that kind of change? And for Carl, who is working hard in school, has he had enough space and rest to feel equipped to go into another pastoral role? What does a pastoring look like when he's been changed by school? Is there a church out there for us? But what about M.C.C.?

So as you can see the meeting brought up a lot of questions, and answers, and then more questions. I was so glad for this time for people to give their insight into our lives. It was encouraging for people who have only known us for 8 months to be able to identify our weaknesses and our gifts. I think that's just amazing that in such a short time people can see so much. The comfort of it all was that these people don't have any strings attached to us because no matter what we do or where we go, eventually all of us will leave school and leave this time and space where our lives have intersected. There was a safety in hearing what they had to say.

I'm thinking that Carl and I need to schedule in a post ministry discernment seminar meeting, maybe over a nice meal or something, but this time, I don't intend to be distracted by taking minutes.

Kezia's Quilt

I've had a little bit of a project the last few weeks. When Mom and Dad Heppner were here in March, Mom taught me how to do a rag quilt. I had done my first quilt for Joel's birthday, but I wanted to make a different kind, one for my friend and another for Kezia.

So at the end of March, I went back to sewing after our time with company had come to an end. I was quite thrilled that the first quilt for my friend turned out as well as it did. I was able to finish it on the second evening.

Kezia and I went to the fabric store together. Well, I suggested a few patterns to her, but she saw the one she wanted and didn't waver. Kezia picked the yellow fairy print, which was quite nice. And so when we went to find a complimentary solid colour, she insisted on the purple. There was no pink that she wanted, and the green didn't suit her fancy. As I stood there wondering how this would work, it dawned on me that the contrasting colours would look really good. Kezia made a great choice.

The quilt took longer than I expected, but I enjoyed working on it and Kezia loved to watch me. It was kind of nice not to have to wait until the kids were in bed; I just waited until Asha had her afternoon sleep. Kezia helped take out some of the pins and chattered to everyone about her new blanket that her Mom was making. Joel got into the action as well, but only once. He got a bit excited about the pedal and stomped on it, nearly sewing my fingers together....
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Well, after two weeks, three trips to the fabric store for more fabric, two needles, and 4 washes and dries, the rag quilt was finished. I put it on her bed with her new pillowcase before she got home from school. She was thrilled with the quilt and very upset that Joel wanted to roll on it; it would get dirty and crooked! I was so happy that she loved it.

I realize that without Mom Heppner's help, I wouldn't have been able to do this quilt at all. And Danae gave me some great advice over the phone on how to do the finishing touches, which made the quilt much better. Thank you both! So Ms. Maclean was wrong, I can sew! Yes I can!
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A Day with Beckham

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Carl still has a to do list of things he wants to experience while in California; Yosemite National Park, Craig Ferguson's show, Vintage Faith Church...and of course to see the Los Angeles Galaxy Soccer Team play. And today, he got to check one off his list.

At 7:30 this morning, Carl and his friend Ray drove to Los Angeles for the day to see David Beckham and his team play the Toronto F.C. I was glad that it worked out, because as of Friday night, Carl still didn't have anyone who could make the Sunday noon game. Ray is a really neat guy, from our homegroup, and Carl was really looking forward to spending some time with him.

The drive down was fairly uneventful, except for the great conversation. They arrived at 11:15 and parked the van a few blocks from the stadium. It was a surprising hot day, 35 degrees. Yup...35 degrees on April 13th! Anyways, Carl and Ray both had to find shade, because Ray had seen quite a bit of sun at track meets the last few days, and of course, Carl had to be careful with his lily white complexion.

It was an exciting game with the Galaxy club dominating most of the plays, regardless they couldn't get the ball past the Canadian goalie. Beckham had a few assists, but didn't score any goals. The final score was 3-2 in favour of Toronto. Carl was thrilled....Ray not so much.

After the game, the guys headed home and arrived in Fresno at 7 p.m., happy with the days events and for the chance to spend time with a friend. It was a nice break for Carl and I was really glad that he had the opportunity to go.

I Make an Impact

I have been reminded how I make an impact in two very different ways and they both have stemmed from discussion in the class that I'm taking, Discipleship and Ethics.

First of all, the last three classes have really got me thinking about my role on this earth and how I impact it environmentally. We had a class on environmental ethics which was quite thought provoking. I had never really thought about it, but ethics can't be separated into neat little categories and so when I make a decision about something, it has ramifications that reach farther than I initially see.

I'll give you an example from our class that was led by an FPU prof. He was talking about the cost of organic and fair trade products. In the supermarket they are more expensive when you first read the price tag, but why don't they have the total cost breakdown on the bag of coffee or the apple? Why don't we take in consideration that when I purchase a regular apple, I may be supporting a farmer that only employs seasonal workers. Those workers can't make enough to live on and so they need to rely on social assistance. Or with the use of pesticides, introduces health problems that put a weight on health care. When I purchase an apple from Chili how much does it cost to truck it all the way to California when I could have purchased a "more expensive" apple from the local orchards 15 miles away? And so if I make the decision to eat organically isn't just an environmental decision, but it's also a socially ethical decision as well.

I got to thinking about my impact and how much food is trucked in for me to eat. I'm thinking seriously about the amount of energy is required to keep up with my meat consumption. I'm also thinking that maybe I shouldn't eat fast food as often as I have the desire to (although quite honestly, I think we have had a fast food burger once in the last 5 weeks, but if I had more $$ I would have to admit that I would be there more often...) simply because it is an environmentally bad choice, because of all the waste, and it feeds the demon of busyness, because people say they don't have enough time to sit down with family.

I'm not sure if I'll morph into a vegetarian-organic-only person, but I will eat less meat and I won't be buying styrofoam, even though it's cheaper than paper plates. Heck, I'll bring my own plate from home and then wash it myself! I won't buy regular light bulbs anymore, and I'm going to inform myself about the products that I buy. If I buy a certain type of product, how does it effect people in different parts of the world? What kind of waste does it produce? Is it the ethical thing to do? What kind of example am I setting for my kids? Do I make decisions that are very self centred or does it take in account other people? The website www.responsibleshopper.org is a great place to start and so though you can't be in my class with me and benefit from the discussion (nor do I want to rant and rave for pages and pages here on my blog), maybe if you have the chance, check it out. We can be purposeful about how we live, making thoughtful decisions instead of making careless choices.

I did a presentation in yesterday's class with Brenda on carrying for creation. It was put together in 45 minutes and we were the only group with two people. Mark tried to get us to split off and step into one of the other 5 groups, but we said we'd be fine with just the two of us. I was a bit nervous, but Brenda was a great person to work with. We had to present a 5 minute talk about carrying for creation, focusing on being centred-set and not guilting people with, you should's and you have to's. We also included the whole concept of naming, how we have been entrusted as caretakers of this world and as a testimony to those who don't know God. I think it went pretty well....

So the second part where I make an impact is through my contributions in class . In last week's class, when we were talking about the television and media, I made a couple of comments that I guess were very insightful. Anyways, after I had made the comments, Mark referred back to them, not once, not twice, not even three times, but FOUR times. Boy, I was feeling pretty proud of myself. I'm glad that I didn't take the easy way out and kept my mouth shut.

And then yesterday at common meal, while we sat with Mark for lunch, he told me again that he appreciated my comments and was glad that I could offer insight to the class.

Well, this morning I got an email from Mark affirming Brenda and I that our presentation was well thought out, from the concepts to the centred set language we used.

Wow....I hope my head isn't getting big. Anyways, I hope that the impact I make in this world and the contributions in my class benefit and give life to those around me.

Totally Siblings

We've been asked a number of times who we think Asha looks more like. I guess it's always the blessing of the third child to be compared to her two older siblings. For the most part, I think she looks more like Joel, simply because she doesn't have hair like Kezia did.

Then again, it totally depends on the day. Some days she resembles Joel, others she makes an expression that reminds us of Kezia. Well, you be the judge. Who do you think she looks like?

Thesis Update

It is with great pleasure that Carl Heppner announces the arrival of the second draft of his thesis on April 7, 2008 at 12:20 a.m. Pacific Time.

After many months of hard labour, all of his writing, his major revisions, and formatting are done.

Yes, Done.

She is so beautiful, all 130 pages, carefully laid into the binder.

All that's left is for final comments from his thesis advisor before he can schedule his defense.

And just a note, Carl is the first student to complete this part of the thesis process this semester.

I think this calls for a special celebration; and I'm not just talking about McDonald's!

more updates to come......

Menno Reconnect

This past weekend was the annual West Coast Mennonite Central Committee Relief Sale. It was held at the FPU campus right next door. I hadn't anticipated going, but on Friday night, some other folks from the courtyard were planning to go and so I packed up the kids for the 3 minute walk over. I was so glad that we went.

Nate and Maddie joined us, and so Nate wandered off with the two older Heppner kids, while Maddie and I visited with some other MBBS people. We walked through the Ten Thousand Villages tent and looked at all the amazing crafts, beautiful clothes and purses and all the cookbooks. I had purposely not brought my wallet so I wouldn't spend anything that first night. Way too much great stuff!

Maddie and I went into the auditorium to look at all the handmade quilts and afghans that were being auctioned off. I was taken aback at the handiwork. The quilts were so amazing....I don't know if I could ever learn to do that. It was getting loud, so after a few more chats with friends, we made our way out. Nate and the kids had gone by the food station and gotten a big bag of kettle popcorn and some fritters. All three of them were very happy.

The next morning, I went with Maddie and the kids to the waraneki lunch. We waited in line with Ben and Alisa for over 30 minutes and paid, GASP, $12 for 3 waraneki, some salad, 2 pieces of kielbasa and a small cup of pluma moos. But I had to because Maddie had never had waraneki before and it had been about 8 months since I had had any. I was pretty desperate!

Oh the lunch was good. The kids had eaten a large breakfast and so they didn't even finish one plate between the two of them. Asha had her first taste of waraneki and loved it. She kept squawking for more. I was getting full and there was still some left, so I decided that I would take the rest for Carl. He didn't come because he needed to finish the editing on his thesis.

After lunch, Maddie had to work and Kezia and Asha were in desperate need of a nap so we headed back. Later on in the afternoon, Joel wanted to go back to the sale, so we walked over. It was nice to go just with him. I gave him the opportunity to ask and pay for things since it was just the two of us, and he really enjoyed that. We picked up a balloon sword for him, and he also asked the lady to make his sister a purple flower (he said she would be disappointed if he came home with something and she didn't have a cool balloon), we shared a snow cone because the lemonade stand was sold out and then made our way back to the quilt auctions. Joel was intrigued with the guy yelling into the mic and all the people flapping their arms in the air. I bought the Simply in Season cookbook and a neat map of the world. On our way back, we stopped just in time to have a jump in the bounce house before they closed it down.

For supper, we went to Derek and Laura's place for faspa. It was weird not having it on Sunday, but hey, I'll take faspa any day of the week! We had fresh zwiebach and jam and cheese and fruit....it was so yummy. Asha had a great time being licked by the three little pups that were there and being carried around by Laura's dad. Joel and Kezia played frisbee with Laura's sister Sarah most of the evening on the lawn. By 7:30, we were all tired and decided it was time to go home. What a wonderful day to connect with our friends and reunited with our beloved Mennonite food.

Smart Cheerio

Homegroup Serves

Sunday was a full day for the Heppner family. In fact, the whole weekend was busy. We went to the English service, after a short and interrupted night, and stayed for the Spanish service because Joel and Kezia were singing with the preschool. I wish I would have brought my camera to capture Joel's passionate rendition of I Have a Friend Who Loves Me. Kezia just stood there and smiled and then waved and then smiled again....she said she forgot she was suppose to sing!

For lunch, our homegroup met for a potluck. Asha was feeling tired since she was up frequently with her parents.....so she went for a sleep right after the meal. The kids jumped on the trampoline and some of the adults played Chronology, which is a very fun game, while one adult (Carl) snored on the couch!

At 3:30 we packed up into three vehicles and headed downtown to the Fresno Rescue Mission. One of the guys in our homegroup has connections with the Mission and thought it would be a good idea for us all to go and serve supper.

We arrived at 4:00 and all met in the parking lot before we went inside. I have to admit, I was feeling a bit nervous about the whole thing. Well, we took a walk around the parking lot and down the sidewalk to the Mission. It was troubling to see that there were about 40 homeless people sitting on the sidewalk around the entrance; in fact there were homeless people standing around for the entire block. We went in to the entrance and I became less tense. A few of the staff members showed us where the men have chapel, where they have classes, and the dining room where meals were served.

After the 30 minute tour, we went across the street to see the shelter for the women and children. We met the lady that ran the place with her husband and heard stories of how people end up at the shelter. She took us to one of the family rooms that they have for married couples and their children; she told us that if the parents aren't married, the dad has to go across the street with the men.

As I stood in the family room, I was overcome with sorrow to think that a mom, dad, and their children would be so down and out that they would have to come to a shelter. How scary and stressful it would be for the parents. How hard it would be for them to be strong for their kids in light of their situation. How upsetting to think that some children don't have the basics that we take for granted.

While we walked out of the room, Kezia wanted to know why the room was full of toys and games and towels. I explained to her that people donate things so that the kids who don't have any toys can have something special. She smiled, "That's really nice Mom...so when are we going to feed the poor people?". Ummmm...

Okay, so I tactfully explained to our kids again what we were doing, in light of some of the things they had already seen and our group made our way back to the Dining Hall across the street. We split up into two groups. Carl and Joel plus a few others went to serve the spaghetti and bread and Kezia and I, with Asha on my back, went with the rest to serve dessert.

We passed out desserts to each person that came by, Kezia was thrilled to give out the cupcakes. It was so awesome to see the kids happily serving and smiling just to make someone's day. After a while, standing 3 inches from all the goodies, Kezia was tempted to sneak a taste. But she didn't and I was very proud of her. She somehow understood that the treats were for those that don't have much at all.

I gazed across the crowd of people, my heart ached. I was feeling ashamed that I hadn't done this more often. It's so easy to hide in your comfortable neighbourhood and not look people in the eye and acknowledge their poverty. In light of what I was seeing, how can I ever say that I don't have enough? How will this effect the way that I live? MCC has a poster that says, Live simply so that others may simply live.

And then I saw the girl who was about 6 months pregnant and I had to fight back tears. I had a baby on my back, a baby who has a safe place to sleep. When I was pregnant I was able to get prenatal care and have enough to eat. And when my baby was born, she was welcomed into a stable and happy home. I wondered about this woman, and so though it would have been safer to stay behind the table, I went over to talk to her.

After we served the supper and the room was cleared, the staff offered the kids corndogs. Kezia and Joel were thrilled and thought it was the best supper ever! Then we walked out front (we could have walked out the back and avoided the sidewalk), passed all the men that were waiting to get into the shelter for the night. Instead of averting my eyes and shuffling uncomfortably passed, I looked at them and tried to give a smile.

We packed up in the vans and went for a drive past Tent City, a make-shift homeless community under the old 99 freeway. I was troubled when I saw the pregnant girl standing in front of her tent, in front of her home under the freeway.

Then we drove home and we unpacked our kids and all our food from the potluck into our comfortable apartment....